actually i kind of suddenly reflect to the past... have i done wrong anything? have i neglected your action- which i accidently done it to many people untill much longer they told me, have i overly concern. when you are down i really concern with my heart, when you are happy i am really happy, when u do things i rather u put the blame on me rather than u become sad, well all this action were initially as a friend till some of your innocent action touches my hearts but then... ... and what reallly intrigue me is your natural and innocent smile to concern and your expression.

i love not your body but your face
i love not your face but your smile
love not your smile but your expression
i love not your expression but your innocence
i love your innocence for who you are.


yet i understand you too little,
cant get in to your heart
cant have the time with you
cant have the destiny to be with you
for i know i am not cut up for your lover.

i guess you really given up and didnt want to know any more... i was hoping everyday hoping that you would call and ask... is ok .. then just a friend i shall be... ... someone to play with and accompany. i will be there when u need, but i guess u have so much more other friend, other friend that you tell them when u are going away for long vacation, someone to eat dinner with and play piano woth you ... is ok is ok ... for i am just mcenroe ... a substituted friend for you .. a friend that think too much ... sometime i really wonder are we really really good friends? hmm.,.. but if u really call i would tell you i like the natural way you are when u have no make up when u didnt think too much and act the way u like... ... ooo well. friend jiu friend, 还能珍惜对方，还能讲话就好。我也不要求了。。。 不果我会再慢慢了解你。=）

you told me not to get distracted, but some how you will pop into my brain unknowingly and i will stop again... ... ke shi wo bu xiang ni bu kai xin ... ...

what's life sometime i wonder.... does everything really have a price to pay? hahas... haiz

if i will hurt you ... i rather you be happy ...

i dont know why, when i recently see the photos of you. no doubt you grown more and more beautiful and lady like with long hair. dont know why i got this feeling i wish to see you the way you are when we were primary school when u had short hair when we always fight and play. but i guess is long over... ... but still i will remember you as a good friend

i really scared... i guess i let u see too much of my weakness .. hahs... u are the only one that had seen before so much of my emotion ....

come to think of it, i like know nothing of you. i dont know what u like to eat, drink ,colour, do. all i just know about you is what a normal friend should know. so i think i shall try to understand you totally first, and know what you are think, but compare me and your ex. i like some much lousy, he got looks i no looks, he know how to get your attention i cant by being myself, money oo well i am a poor guy what else i win study, well i cant manage well now, still got what nothing , ooo well .... let me try understand you first maybe.. my thinking will change and miracle will happen .. hahas ... but i hope u remember. a promise is a promise and i promise to tell u i will but i hope u also keep your promise and tell me when u are sad and when you have a boyfriend.

i always want to know how to put password but when i know i find it so trouble some . have to type in everytime to read my post .... sometime i find that love the feeling can be troublesome, when u want to try it is like so many things will try to stop you. actually i really want to ask but i just want to know how you are feeling, i rather you tell me an answer rather then ambiguous. but then the problem is i cant even meet you ... haiz... sometime i really wonder what's love what's life.

Wa... so hard to maintain a friendship... bang!!!!

whether or not ... is all fate since some things is just destiny .

sometime i really want to ask you dearly .. what am i to you ... as a friend? a good friend? a best friend or some one dear to you. or am i just one of your Hi bye friend ... to me i am like nothing to you someone redundent to you, useless to you and someone no point concerning ... i guess i am just useless... u always break the chance of see you for some crap reason ... television programme sleepy nvm .. maybe i thinking too much ... but then i still wish you good luck for you i once concern and care dearly to.

should i say before u go ... is it the right thing... i seriously dont know anymore ... i am so useless
T.T

sometime i am really asking myself, did i really change too much or is that i dont know you at all or is that u change too much. for what i know is that, this year i have been struggling alot ... social, acedemic, health, metal ... for i wish i really wish to have time to get close to you and understand you. however you always seems to get away from me...if that the case i rather you tell me directly. Maybe just maybe we are to great apart, for i hope u try longer to get close to me .

i am doing for your good, so am i asking... please dont hate me...

actually all i want is to pass down all i learn to other people ... so that one day if i ever achieve something my student will be able to catch up and dont waste my effort to the drain ... and even still live when i gone. actually i myself also like teaching ... but then i sometime to greedy i thinks .. hahas

有时候，我会在不知不觉中想起你。。。。。。。。。 可是就是不能。。。

so much things to do, so little time.

if you were to come today, i will tell you my true words but then ... maybe the haven already given me the answer isnt it ... but still i am still disappointed in you. you never take my words to heart, maybe to you i serve as a useless friend right...?

i feel like i understand a little bit today .. hahas .... there still more to come .. hahahs

i am no one but a boy... i still need all the life a human need.

我真的需要读书。。。 阿阿阿阿阿啊阿啊阿。。。！！！！

do you know how tired i actually am both mentally and physically ... let me guess ... no one knows... pathetic,,...,,...

actually you are right... till now i dont really understand you... from now on ... i will try to undersatand u as much as i can ... but first of all ... i cant even understand my homework ... but when talking to you .. there are alot of phrases i cant say cause i really scared u wont get use to it ... but no matter what i will settle my work first then i will settle you... then i will see how.. hahas ... d

i will try after exam .. if my feeling have not fade this time i will give myself no more reason ... even if fail ...i then do something else .... i suppose...

i got a weird weird feeling...

越长大我觉得我越笨。。。有一天我会解释给你听，请等多一下。。